THE DWARVES

Between being merchandised into everything from bobbleheads to belt buckles, scoring MTV reality shows, making solo records and fucking way more than middle aged legends have any right to reports of our demise ran rampant once again. But you can't keep the best band down and the masters returned in 2011 with our newest masterpiece to date THE DWARVES ARE BORN AGAIN. Featuring every Dwarf ever. It was a return not only to our hardcore glory days, but to the garage and retro styles where the whole saga started 25 years and countless blown minds ago.

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Die hard fans mauled CHIP FRACTURE after a show in Bilbao, Spain after playing Eddie Van Halen's entire solo from 'Eruption' with his teeth. THE FRESH PRINCE OF DARKNESS was arrested on cocaine smuggling charges, but managed to consume all of the evidence before trial and wound up serving 3 years in his living room watching bad horror movies. HEWHOCANNOTBENAMED made the classic Sunday School Massacre (Greedy Records) and embarked on an extensive tour of Croatia and Lower Slobovia.

25 years is a long time to rule Rock, and we've done it! Now that our fans have caught up with the records we made in 1986 we predict massive sales of the Dwarves Are Born Again sometime near our 50th anniversary. Until then, we'll see you in the pit! 25 THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE DWARVES