For starters, we build our own confetti cannons from a genius assemblage of PVC pipes and Nerf parts, then stuff them with hand-made confetti.
“Why don’t you just buy confetti?”
“We couldn’t find the kind that falls right. So this is the solution.”
“How much confetti do we need?”
“A metric ass pile.”
“But I’m really worried about you cutting yourself.”
“That’s why I was given this job. I’m the careful one of the bunch.”